I have no clue what is going on with my life! I do not know what is wrong with me and yeah with my life too. Frustrating enough! What else do I have to complain ? I'm His perfect creation, the fortunate one for I'm gifted with perfect family and decent life yet as you are aware, I am complaining. I can't believe I am complaining. What is there to complain when life has been fair enough to me ? There are unfortunate people out there with greater obstacles in their lives, yet they are not complaining, they are succeeding instead. But what is happening to me ? Where are the optimism, motivation, spirit, enthusiasm and courage I once had ? and Oh ya, I have not been seeking Him lately. Perhaps that is why I don't feel blessed anymore for the God is hardly in the center of my attention now. Pretty much messed up inside, not knowing what I am trying to fit into! I only hope by the time I buck up, it's not too late to make things better. Oh Lord, hear me out please. :(
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Lost.
What do I say ? Urmm, these days have been really hard for me. I have been having issues going on lately, in my life. I have no say, totally. It was once upon a time when I felt really blessed. I can see things falling appart. I wish it only gets better, but neah! I don't know what I want. Thus, I don't know where I am heading to. Completely clueless, not knowing what comes first in life. I have all desires, a lot of dreams, not to mention my beloveds' hopes and expectations on me. I have disappointed them once. They were really hurt. I was and I am too. But what do I do next ? It feels like a girl standing all by herself in a stranded land under the rain without people around, with no paths to follow, if only you know what's she going through inside. I have nice people around me. Yet, there's something that I don't get enough from them. Don't ask me what is that, it is just that. Confusion in mind and sorrow at heart. The motivation, enthusiasm, willingness to do anything to achieve my goals, self-esteem, confidence are no longer there in me. I truly miss the old me! That pretty obedient daughter whom my mom's always been proud of, that daddy's eldest daughter who only knew winning!
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dearie,I know how it feels,at one point of life or even more than tht,all of us will feel the same..the desire n enthusiasm is there but there's something holding us bk and 'the obedient' person wont listen to the latest us but hey,you can't let this go..it's ok if you make mistakes but dont miss any chances,atleast then you knew you hv tried which is always better than doing nothing.so for now stop complaining like a 80 year old,take a chill pill or go out to ur fav hut and sip your fav coffee/make urself ur fav caramel popcorn/listen to songs/go on disturbing my other 2 lil sisters..take a deep breath and go out to make some changes..come on dearie,believe me you're not alone and there's more to come your way.I pull myself everyday to work,you can do it,there's still ample of time,love ya:)
ReplyDeleteAww thank you so much, sister. This means a lot to me :) I love you more! xoxo
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